Your Truth, My Truth: Why Reality is Different for Everyone

I learned a lot from people who said to me, "Don't listen to a word I say."

What they meant was that they don't have the truth.

They can't see the future, and they don't know if what worked for them would work for you as well.

Nothing I say is true, well, at least not for you, for me it is.

It is my truth, but my truth wouldn't necessarily be your truth.

Why?

Well, if my truth and your truth were the same in every aspect, we would agree on everything.

We would have exactly the same world views, values, and visions.

How you interpret the world around you is based on your truth.

In this article, we're going to talk about the truth, and how it is different for everyone.

Also, you will know why it is important to understand this matter.

You will learn how you can shape the truth to your benefit, and by understanding all of this, how the principle of truth can serve you.

The topics are:

• The truth

• What serves you

• What matters

What I am going to tell you now is that everything you will read either is a lie or a truth based on what you believe.

In the end, it is my perspective that can be valuable to you if you see the value in it. So, believe nothing I say and ask yourself why.

That is how you will form your truth.

The Truth

The saying "the truth lies in the middle" is one I've heard a lot in my life, and for me, that saying is true.

People have their own experiences that they see as the truth, but both of those experiences are equally true and false.

If I do not believe in a God, God will not exist for me, but if someone else does believe in God, God will exist for that person.

These two people would never agree, and can only meet in the middle where both truths are equally true.

Your own truth is based on your beliefs, values, and experiences, which means that it will always be different for a lot of people.

The only way of measuring it would be through the reality checklist.

Subjectivity includes what we experience: An inner world of emotions and opinions that are different for each individual.

We never exactly know what somebody else's experiences are; it is their truth.

Objective refers to facts that are unchanging, things we can measure, like gravity.

We have no influence on gravity itself; it simply exists. Yet, we can adapt to gravity by flying in an airplane.

But the force of gravity remains constant and unaffected; this can be a shared truth, because the unchanging thing that you can’t deny is something people cannot get around.

Then there is intersubjectivity, which is a bit more complicated.

It is the combination of what is objective and what we experience.

For example, time.

Objectively speaking, time can be measured and follows seconds, minutes, and hours.

It is a continuous and unchanging flow that we measure using clocks and calendars.

From an intersubjective perspective, time can feel different for individuals.

Waiting for something unenjoyable can seem endless, while pleasant moments fly by.

This is also the perfect example of “people having their own truth”, it literally shows how your truth exists in the objective world bound to an experience.

Acknowledging the fluidity of truth allows us to remain adaptable and open to new ideas and experiences.

What Serves You

"What serves you?" is an interesting question when it comes to the truth.

What I've learned so far is that honesty serves you well.

It serves you because when you're honest, even when people don’t want to hear it, they know what they're dealing with.

Being honest does not mean that you need to tell people everything, nor does it mean that you need to tear people down.

It means finding the right time and pace to share your perspective.

The truth is most valuable for others to hear, and it is always easier for you to create the right conditions.

If you lie about your capacity or capability, you can put yourself in positions you are maybe not ready for.

People can also say: "You're being delusional."

Our personal truths can create a reality distortion field, blinding us to other perspectives.

That is why it is important to have a truth-checking system and for that, you can use the previously talked about objective, subjective, or intersubjective matrices.

And what if you are a bit delusional and you know it.

Is that wrong?

Well, personally, I don’t think so.

Why?

Well, if it does no one harm and still is ethical, but it serves you well, I don’t see a problem with it.

I am delusional sometimes when it comes to stress or certain pressure by saying that I don’t feel it or experiencing it, or that it only gives me extra power and does no harm.

I know that mindset serves me, even though I also know a lot of people, including professional researchers, would disagree.

But I am not believing in their truth because it does not serve me, and people have all the right to call me delusional for that.

Understanding the power of truth also serves me in a way that I can recognize certain patterns better.

When people are lying to themselves or to others, you can recognize the rabbit hole they're diving into, even if it’s a positive or negative spiral upward or downward.

What I also personally experience is that it is easier to confront people with their own lies by asking the right questions, and being genuinely interested in their truth.

The concept of truth can serve you and your surroundings if you use it in a way that fits your life.

What Matters

What matters when you talk about the truth, is that you are truthful to yourself as well as others, and being conscious of the effects of what your truths bring, even if you're delusional or not.

Having honest people around you is really valuable because they can confront you with your own mistakes.

Also, being able to be honest to everyone gives you more room to be yourself, you don’t have to hold back or watch your tongue.

I said to my girlfriend that I gained a bit of weight, she first denied it.

Then I asked her not to lie, because I knew for certain I gained a little.

And she told me the truth and said yes, a small bit.

When she tells me the truth, she helps me to not find excuses for myself.

She helps me to bring out the better side of me because then I know where I stand.

If you don’t know where you are, you can never set a good route to get to the point where you want to be.

Honesty is key in that process whether you want to hear it or not.

Another thing that matters is that you respect and accept the truth of the other.

Why?

Because you can learn from that as well.

You can always agree to disagree, you don’t have to be right or wrong.

You need to understand the other and accept the differences for what they are.

What I experience from that is that I learn new perspectives that can lead to a more empathetic understanding of other people's truths and experiences that widen my worldview.

Lastly, it matters that others respect your worldview, your truth.

They can challenge it, but they have to respect it.

If people tear your worldview down without respect or argumentation, you know those people will not be of much value to you.

Mutual respect is key when it comes to the truth and understanding others' truths.

Viewed Together

To put all these perspectives together in a couple of concrete sentences, this is my truth about the truth.

Everyone lives in their own world, their own form of the truth.

Never believe what I am or someone else is saying before thinking about it yourself. Make use of the objective, subjective, or intersubjective matrices to get a clearer view on where the truth lies.

If you see your truth and the truth of the other for what it is, make sure it serves you.

Being honest to yourself and others will serve you in the long run.

Let others be honest to you and to themselves.

Being delusional is okay if it does no harm and is still ethical, when it serves you.

The more familiar you get with the concept of truth, the more patterns in people's lives you can recognize.

Respect others' truth and agree to disagree, you don’t have to be right or wrong.

Learn from others by understanding them.

Be aware of your surroundings, that people tell you the truth, but do not tear you down.

If this concept of truth was of value to you, share it because then it can be of value to someone else as well.

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That's it for now.

I wish you a good day - Job Baltes.