Dare to Commit: Invest in Your Future

I experienced a commitment as fun, simple but hard.

I am committed to the process of creating the life I want and being the person I want to be.

I aim for consistent growth, setting forth my mission to help as many people as possible express themselves.

During this journey, I sometimes feel empty, I am hard on myself, and sometimes I am just lost, not knowing what to do and unable to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

My commitments help me push through these challenges and remind me why I do what I do, making me believe that it's worth it.

What are your commitments?

Do you feel lost sometimes?

What do you do to keep moving forward?

A commitment is simple, but not easy. We will dive into that later!

You probably guessed it already.

In this article, we are going to dive into commitments.

To break it down, we're going to talk about:

• What are commitments

• Fear of commitment

• Emotions around Commitment: having vs being

• Simple but Hard

What are commitments

To provide an accurate answer, I referred to the Cambridge dictionary.

Commitments are:

• A promise or firm decision to do something

• Willingness to give your time and energy to a job, activity, or something that you believe in

• Something that you must do or deal with that takes your time

• An amount of money that you have to pay, or the fact of promising to pay

So, a commitment boils down to making a decision that will cost you something, be it money, time, effort, or all three!

It could be small or big, that does not matter much.

As long as you make a choice, stand by it, and give it your all.

Do the necessary required actions, else there will be no result and it is more a trial than a commitment.

A commitment is what demonstrates in results.

It is what alters and maintains behavior.

It is an action you take or don’t take to move up higher and grow with the backed-up results.

Scared of commitment

Being scared of commitment refers to the fear of dedicating yourself to something for a long time, whether that’s a job, a goal, a city, or a relationship.

Without a commitment you wil not come further than mediocre in life or a low level life.

Commitment issues frequently arise in romantic relationships, but they also often apply to goals, purposes, or sticking with a decision.

Individuals with commitment issues typically show fear or unwillingness to engage in long-term relationships or decisions.

These issues make moving forward challenging.

Commitment issues can come from a trauma in the past, this can lead to commitment issues in the future.

Other factors can stem from the childhood experiences, These influences can shape ones attachment style.

For instance, people who usually show avoidant attachment might struggle with commitment.

There is but one question to ask yourself.

Do you live in the past or the future?

If you work in the present from your past, you will not go forward and stay where you are.

If you work in the present towards the future, you will move forward and start creating something for THE FUTURE!

The choice is yours; both are fine with me.

However, personally, I believe the past is dead and I need to create my future.

Dwelling in the past will not move me forward.

signs of commitment issues:

• If you consistently end things past a casual or trying out stage, despite knowing it is beneficial for you, you may be dealing with unresolved commitment issues.

• If you don't think about the future or consider the next steps, it's okay to enjoy the present. However, if you consistently avoid thinking about the future, it could indicate a fear of commitment.

• You often spend time questioning your actions rather than taking them. While understanding your motivations is important, once this is clear, focus on action rather than questioning or considering quitting.

• If you choose not to invest in yourself or your commitments, it indicates a clear decision. A willingness to move forward is shown by commitment, otherwise, such things are avoided.

Emotions Around Commitment: Having vs. Being

Remember this key concept:

YOU ARE NOT YOUR EMOTIONS, YOU HAVE EMOTIONS!!!

What does that mean?

Let's explain with an example:

People often say "I am tired" or "I am mad" when they feel tired or angry.

But by saying "I am tired" or "I am mad", it's as if you're introducing yourself as 'tired' or 'angry' instead of your name.

You are what you identify with.

You can feel tired but still be someone with a lot of energy.

You can feel angry and still be someone who lives a happy life.

Stop saying to yourself "I am" if it is not of benefit to you.

If you do that, you become a product of your own emotions in a way that holds you back.

Start saying things like:

• I have a feeling of…

• I experience…

This made a radical difference for me personally.

You can still acknowledge your state of being but are not obligated to it.

When it comes to commitment, we use all kinds of emotions and stories to stop or slow down.

Then you're not committed, then you're just a try-hard.

There is no trying in a commitment.

Having vs being can make a big difference.

I could write a whole article about this topic alone.

Simple but Hard

What we know now is:

A commitment involves making a decision that can require:

• An investment

• Time

• Effort

• Money

Regardless of its size, a commitment requires standing by a choice and fully investing in it.

Without necessary actions, a commitment is merely a trial and does not yield results.

Commitments are demonstrated through results, alter and maintain behavior, and facilitate growth.

Fear of commitment, often seen in romantic relationships, can also impact goals and decisions, potentially stemming from past traumas or childhood experiences.

This fear can lead to avoidance of long-term relationships or decisions, stagnation, and potential self-sabotage.

Overcoming this fear involves working towards the future rather than dwelling in the past, taking action once motivations are understood, and showing a willingness to invest in commitments.

Emphasize the distinction between having emotions and being defined by them.

Instead of identifying oneself with emotions, such as saying "I am tired" or "I am mad", it's more beneficial to express them as experiences or states, like "I have a feeling of tiredness" or "I experience anger".

This shift in language can make a significant difference, especially when it comes to commitment, preventing emotions from becoming obstacles.

It is all not that complicated but hard to follow.

It took me a long time to see what I am committed to and to define what a commitment is for myself.

If you do not achieve a commitment, it could only be due to two things:

• You did not put in the time and effort to achieve it.

• It was not a real commitment.

Ask yourself, what do I want to achieve in life?

What are my goals?

What are the things I really want?

Then make commitments to achieve that and take action!

Next Step to Take NOW!

If you want to make a real commitment now, share this article with anyone who you think needs to hear this, no matter how hard it may be.

Do it from a place of love and goodwill to commit to their growth!

If you've come this far and someone sent this article to you, acknowledge a feeling of happiness and sweetness because the one who sent it is rooting for you.

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That's it for now.

I wish you a good day - Job Baltes.