The Compass Within: How Values Shape Your life

You are somewhere, at a party, with certain people, or at that one place, and the only thing you think is, "What am I doing here?" Or you think to yourself sometimes, "Why don't I feel fulfilled? Why are certain things bothering me so much?"

I had a lot of those kinds of questions in my head.

Those were the types of questions that I asked myself frequently, not knowing the answer.

Now I do know, after a year of development, through life, business, and personally of course.

This is what I found out that it was for me.

One word, Values. Knowing your own values written out for yourself.

I will share my thoughts, experiences, and how all of this may benefit you.

You will understand the value of values.

I will talk about it divided into three topics:

• Values

• Negative Values

• The Choice

When you understand this, it can bring you clarity, it can help you understand yourself better, and it can create more ownership.

Values

To start, what are values?

The way I learned it is that values are the things that are important to you in life.

I am specifically talking about personal values.

For example, my top 10 values right now are:

1. Freedom

2. Personal growth

3. Ambition

4. Relationships & friendship

5. Purpose

6. Gratitude

7. Vitality

8. Money

9. Satisfaction

10. Integrity

Everything I do needs to align with my values, as they guide my decisions and priorities.

Not fully understanding or acknowledging your own values can lead to confusion and dissatisfaction.

Values are shaped by our experiences and influences, including parents, family, friends, and role models.

Adopting others' values instead of identifying and living by your own can cause confusion and dissatisfaction.

Misalignment between actions and values can create inner tension and a sense of loss of control.

Therefore, it's crucial to identify and record your values that align with your identity and desires.

The top value on your list is your driving force.

For me, freedom is my driving force, so everything I do is tied to this value.

Freedom of mind, freedom of place, and freedom of choice (financially free).

That is why I am doing what I do, and I bind that to my mission to have a sense of purpose.

Also, the people around you need to align with your values or should have complementary ones.

When your values fundamentally do not align, there is a big chance that the other is not helping you in your life, that there is some tension now and then, and that in the long term, you both wouldn’t be happy in the friendship or relationship that you're in.

Negative Values

You have your personal values that are important, but you also have your negative values that are important.

Your negative values are the values that you do not want around you, the things that you despise, the things that irritate you.

It could also be that you embody some of your negative values yourself, but do not like that part of you.

My negative values are:

1. Criticizing others

2. Negativity

3. Not taking responsibility

4. Laziness

5. Victim behavior

When people exhibit these behaviors or characteristics frequently, I know they're not my kind of people.

When you have clarity about what you do not want in people around you, you can filter better.

You have one life, and 24 hours, so I personally spend what I have with people that align with my values or do not have any of the characteristics that fit into my negative values.

Also, your negative values can be a good mirror.

When you feel out of control, or when you have a bad feeling, look at your negative values and see if the way you're dealing with it is the opposite of your negative values.

A funny thing I did was ask my best friend and my girlfriend both to write down 7 positive values about me, that is also a great way to see if you live up to your own values.

They both wrote the following:

1. Girlfriend: Self-development | Best friend: Being active (doing)

2. Girlfriend: Being happy | Best friend: Freedom (mind and being)

3. Girlfriend: Honesty | Best friend: Creativity

4. Girlfriend: Carefulness | Best friend: Reliability

5. Girlfriend: Money | Best friend: People-oriented

6. Girlfriend: The family | Best friend: Adventurousness

7. Girlfriend: Friendship | Best friend: Enthusiasm

This reflects what people close to me see in my behavior and the way I do things.

You can do this yourself as well.

First, write down your own 10 personal values, then write down your 5 negative values, both rows in order of importance.

Lastly, ask 2 to 3 people who know you really well for 7 positive values in order of importance. In this way, you get direct feedback if you're living according to your own values.

The Choice

Now, beyond your values, you have choices.

In the end, everything you do and say is a choice.

The way you choose to deal with certain situations, whether it aligns with your values or not, is always up to you.

When you make a choice, it has a consequence.

t is always in relation to the cause and effect of things.

The same also applies to values, personal and negative.

It is your choice to be somewhere that is not in line with your values.

You choose the people you have around you.

This means that you also can make the choice to have control in your life or not.

A friend of mine told me, "I wake up early and go over my limits as an act of self-love. I do all of this now so I do not have to do this later."

What's so powerful about this statement is that, according to the values of my friend, he makes the choice to work hard and create life in a way that fits his values.

It is up to you.

Do you choose to live or get lived?

It is all about how seriously you take yourself and want to live a life that matters to you.

What Do You Value?

Reflecting on the scenarios at the beginning of this article, it's clear how essential understanding and living by your values truly is.

You might find yourself at a party, among people, or in a place where you question your presence, asking, "What am I doing here?" or "Why don't I feel fulfilled?"

These questions often stem from a misalignment between your actions and your core values.

Recognizing and defining your values can illuminate why certain situations make you uncomfortable or dissatisfied.

Your personal values are the guiding principles that define what is important to you.

They shape your decisions, priorities, and interactions.

Knowing your top values, such as freedom, personal growth, ambition, and integrity, helps you make choices that align with your true self.

Identifying negative values, such as criticizing others, negativity, and laziness, allows you to set boundaries and avoid influences that detract from your well-being.

Recognizing these negative traits in others and yourself provides clarity on what to avoid or change.

Every action you take is a choice.

Aligning your choices with your values leads to a more fulfilling and controlled life.

You have the power to choose your environment, relationships, and behaviors, reinforcing your sense of ownership and purpose.

When you align your life with your values, you gain clarity, a deeper understanding of yourself, and a stronger sense of control.

This alignment reduces inner tension and fosters a more fulfilling existence.

For instance, if freedom is your driving force, ensuring that your lifestyle, career, and relationships support this value will bring you greater satisfaction and purpose.

f you found this article valuable, please share it with someone who might benefit from understanding their values better.

If you're new here, subscribe to receive insightful content and thought-provoking ideas in your inbox every Sunday.

Together we can create individuals who strive to live authentically and purposefully.

If you want more!!

• To connect with me for any type of questions or a quick chat, follow me on Instagram and send me a DM. Click here

• If you want to see more content and learn, you can subscribe to my YouTube channel. Click here

• Follow me on twitter/X if you want some daily knowledge to consume. Click here

• Same here for Tik-Tok. Click here

That's it for now.

I wish you a good day - Job Baltes.